Its was 12:23 on the Wednesday before Christmas when I got the text "have you heard about (insert name)" my heart hurts as it sinks to darkness and my breath gets short and painful, my head is dizzy and fuzzy as I read the letters that form the words that form the message over and over, because no I have not heard, but just from that message I know, I know you've become part of the 22, because this is the only time it seems we reach out to each other, and I dont want to respond to the message. I want to ignore it. I want to pretend I never saw it, and I can go on with the fantasy that you are alive and well and I am alive and well and we have just drifted apart, but that is not the case, you have fallen, the demons have consumed you, you battled on and on, but in the end you have lost. And I blame myself, I haven't talked to you in so long, and I blame everyone else, because why don't we have each others backs anymore, and I blame the war, and I blame the world and I blame our species and our gods and I blame you and I wish I could punch you in that big head. I hate you right now and I love you right now and I'm so horribly sad and angry right now. And now this another weapon my demons will use against me and now my battle has become harder just like the last brother and the last brother and the last brother and I'm tired of these text im tired of these deaths and im tired of these demons we battle and I want to cry and I should be crying, but I can't bring myslef to cry, so here I am sitting on Facebook writing another stupid writing.
©® Tanmoy
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