Addiction
Getting high trying to numb the pain, softly I hear the quite soft hate up in my brain!
Why cant I get high enough to forget all the things I've done, all the regret.
Your right the answer not in this shot, but my pain melts away so why fucking not.
I have said I'm quitting once and for all, but then my emotions catch feelings every thing has returned and yup guess what I fall
There is no more denying it,
I'm addicted to this shit
I wont to stop but end up doing it anyway
my loved ones cant take the pain from withdrawals as much as I cannot.
I dont enjoy hurting them but
This addiction I just can't rise above
My pin hole eyes cannot be disguised
some call it addiction I call it my sweet lil secret affair the doctors know how
I feel
numb, emotionless, lonely, not here
my secret romance
my lil love affair
little did I know the depths of disloyalty I was near
my kriponight
my king I had no fear till it drank my soul beware
the struggle to change was unimaginable
this routine became my life sometimes wondered if it was mine
soon it became aware it was the life of addiction the doctors knew how when I use
I feel
peaceful, seductive, painfully simple
my secret romance
a romance that must be broken to give my soul another chance doctors knew
I feel
lost, hopeless, a biss,overwhelmed
my secret romance
dreams of conquering the demon romance it danced on my brain and could taste it on my tongue
sober it only was something I imagined
pulling all my strength from deep down I knew I would win this battle to come soon the worst would be over my dear ... the voices I hear
I culd hear the whispers of the romance dwealing far away and the voices of the new romance I was to endure
I began picking up pieces the ones after I fall
I put them together and it took some time try after try piece after piece
what a fucking mess I had lost my entire soul, body and almost it all!
I feel peaceful, engaged, thoughtful, not at war
my secret romance was gone, but in a new way my soul I conquered from the demons dwealing so long
Yes I could hide behind another mask after all lifes one big task
yea feelings let's not ask
I rather pass
struggleing always with the future me and the past me
will this new me stick around or will it just pass
who I am and who I want to be clash
Yes this is me hidden behind everyrelapse the doctor said
I feel
like a warrior, a medalist, a fighter
no longer a secret romance
I told you my feelings, how I Erin for it how it constantly playin me
I explained it all to a great extent
so you know my strength
grew inner and outer
slowing began the person I lost was forming around
Yet I was struggling to see this was Gods best version of me
the battle isnt over the demon only is in his cage
I will fight this till my end of days
I will not grow weak
I am back on my feet
I feel like brand new,
a warrior who saved my self from my horrible fate. shm not longer a disgrace thank you father for your grace amen disappearing from your heart I so gladly set you free goodbye
©unique
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