D

all the dark places...

all the bright places 
are fulla spaceships
 & i hate this
 take this
how u want
cause i dont give a fuck
i live on the edge of a
bridge
 & im ready 2 jump
 but 
if the fall dont kill me
 im looking 2 lUv
 i kno that'll do it 
cause the 2 of us
 have been thru so much 
if i lose it 
you lose it 
the truth is 
im just loosing touch 
wit reality 
so actually 
now i see 
how i need
 to quit all this stalling 
& go all in 
take the leap 
& start falling
 i aint calling 
no lUved one
 or people that hurt me
 2 confront um
 fuck unfinished business
 i aint got none
 but i do got some
 demons
 inside screaming 
they want blood
 but so what 
i dont know much 
but what i do know
 is im going thru 
a blue hole
 feeling a pain few know
but even fewer show 
so
 before i lose control
 & take it further 
then i ever have 
i hope U kno
 what ever past 
U think i have 
didn't make me
 the way i am
 in a sence im not even sad
im glad 
U dont understand 
i mean why would U 
so U get another chance
 2 tell me what i should do
or could do
if i would move 
on
 if i did that 
i would already be gone
but whats wierd is 
i swear
 U dont even kno 
so U think im here
 U hear
 my voice & make the
choice 2 care
 but please 
dont waste a tear 
2 me 
that only means 
i took the pain in me
 & gave U a piece 2 eat 
i hate 2 see
U kno what it takes 2 be
afraid of sleep 
cause even awake
 all U do is dream 
it seems 
so strange its 
like im talking 
another language 
even as i say it
 i kno 
i dont have a way
 2 explain this 
nothing changed its 
i just
 i cant take it 
anymore 
i dont even know 
why in the beginning 
i even did it for 
why go to war 
with anyone else
 when im already at war
with my self 
what goods
 finding
 heaven on earth 
when inside
 im still burning in hell
 oh well
 there no cure 
for wellness
 i can tell its 
never gonna end
 till it does 
but I'll be dambed
 if whats killing me becUms 
whats killing us 
but 
dont think that doesnt
mean i dont feel your lUv
cause i do 
because of U 
i seen who i really am 
and i cant take that 
i hate that
 U lUv me 
U find beauty
 in whats ugly 
so much we 
lost touch im running from
something 
thats nothing 
but me
fuck please
 just let it go
 & move on
 im too gone
 im not trying 2 do wrong
or even do right
 i aint trying 2 live
 i aint trying 2 die
 im not trying 2 laugh
 im not trying 2 cry
 im not even asking why im
just saying goodbye
 2 everyone 
ive ever lUv3d 
in my life 
cause i dont want 
U 2 feel like 
U coulda made a
difference 
with this 
it isn't about U
 even though 
i kno 
i could never exist 
without U...
©doehash