Over time I realized church isn't what it's all cracked up to be. It started back 20 years ago. Even with the eyes of a minor, I knew my mother was just as much endowed with her spirituality as I. Intuition told her the streets will not raise this child.
As we pass police tape and hat-tipping constables, I would be laughing every color like light with stained glass windows and be reminded of how fickle life is. When I was a kid I would envy the wings of a pigeon. But I never understood why they choose to stay pecking for scraps in inner city blocks. Holding hopelessly to the next piece of bread that comes in their direction, as if a little was enough. I would say the same about going to church, a little was enough.
I once went to a black church. I shared pigment with my peers but felt more alien than ever. Prayer so intense they served more as a distraction than an inspiration. Indignation riddled my core when I saw how much the collection played with the minds of the poor.
Eyes closed, tears cascading down side by side with saliva as native tongues would call to the heavens, and I would simply watch, notice the posters, with the pastors face on it. But before that I was taught by an elder to question everything, to see and doubt everything, so whose really in control of the scriptures?
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