Here I am again, a deity of my own doings. Soul crushed, grinded to dust, head levelled with the ground, darkness converging on my rear as if to say its almost time, you know you cant keep fighting. One day you are gonna give up, and Ive made peace with the devil. Looked him in the eye and stealthily decided that maybe just maybe he offers more peace than this I struggle to uphold, its uphill when it feels like Im falling, burning kaleidescope and sensations that rendered me useless to a world of materialistic everything. My mind wants to quit, torture, blood, the stench of dirt and death gathers in the darkest corners of my foul soul. Im nothing but hollow, I dont feel nomore. I breeze through life on what ifs and maybes. Life does not even care if I wake or slumber tomorrow. May Im being selfish this one time. But my what ifs are not valid anymore, isnt it lovely? Torn to pieces. Past bones and skin, Im walking outside of my body and my soul, heapspace spewing out, endless endless ends. Cam this be the beginning of my ending ? Because God knows Im tired of feeling like this.
©lisathea
L