Father..

Looking back , I never got to ask you why you hurt me.
What was the pleasure in touching your daughter inappropriately.
I was just a little girl of age eight.
Why was I your chosen bait.
You knew there was no way I could escape.
I remember as a little girl you are supposed to look up to your father.
But the one who never hurt me was my mother.
What were you thinking in your cruel mind.
At times you were not so kind.
You would drink until you fell to the floor.
I just wanted to run so fast out that door.
I remember after you left I would sleep with my clothes on.
I was scared you would take me but what you did was oh so wrong.
I should have been laughing but instead at night you would grab me and left me crying.
I didn't want to do those things daddy, you hurt me.
And then you would deny
And I would cry
and you would sit there in filth and lie.
When you finally left us for good, I felt relieved.
I felt deceived
I had a father who chose to hurt me.
And make me bleed
Made me believe
That I was a bad child who deserved this pain.
But this was insane..
You are supposed to love your dad
You are supposed to look up to him and be glad.
But not every child gets the good life.
Some suffer in sorrowful strife.
You are supposed to teach your children right from wrong.
Your supposed to feel like you belong.
But not me, I was sexually abused.
I was a child growing up confused.
Every night your dad is supposed to tuck you up to sleep.
Chase the monsters out of your nightmares, and pray the lord your soul to keep.
He was the monster who kept me awake.
It was my heart he set out to break.
©terrylin53