locked in the system, and only one key,
but I have to escape twice.
Once from them, then me.
my whole life on paper,
there perception to read
but the systems corrupted
I'm case #33
no former addresses
no family ties.
nobody visits
and nobody tries.
these pills ive been issued to down one by one fit ever so nicely here under my tongue.
they fit in my mattress so here on my bed
I plan my escape with the voice in my head.
cos for me there's no ending.
not even with age.
when they unlock the doors im not free from this cage.
my prison surrounds me.
these walls just re build
and each cell Is taken by thoughts, there all filled.
past future present,
abuse hurt and pain
they all still reside here.
the worst one is blame.
see shes on full lockdown
shell never be freed
and just to be certain, I swallowed the keys.
its like mental health self created my saviour
but everyone else just provokes my behaviour
cos never has anyone fought for my case
so I made me another, to stand in their place.
so here at this table your all dressed to please
you asked who defends me. and i answered "me"
you all looked confused in your suits and your ties, but I stand my ground better than anyone lies.
so yeah guess I am representing myself.
and here's all the doctors reports on my health
oh didn't you know i am mentally ill.
guess you thought u had cured me with lectures and pills.
let me get guess now you'll say here she goes what an actress.
but seriously go check the hole in my mattress
oh fuck it there's no point youll never believe
why the fuck would you listen I am only 13
not like I have earnt any right to be heard
you've literally sat and ignored every word.
please tell me the picture my key worker painted. I bet she missed out all the years we have dated. fucking hell, hold on,
were getting to deep.
thats a secret between us i swore would keep. all this time in this system drugged ul to restrain me. I've lost it this time, go on try to contain me.
see this little girl who you held in your palm. and swore to the state you would keep her from harm is now here beside you the product you made.
so go on deny it, and hope it will fade.
in the end all that matters, is nobody sees
though I leave here today, I will never be freed
©katiecoady
K