What I appreciate now is that I appreciate whatever blessing that comes my way. Even if it is one thing that is given to me. Before this pandemic started, I was the type of person who was never satisfied with what I would get. I was greedy and selfish. I used to always take advantage of certain people. If someone gave me one thing, I wanted more. I had to really pray that spirit away. And as far as being selfish, it was really hard for me to be a blessing to others and including the church. Why it was hard for me to be a blessing to the church is because I felt like I was giving my money away to a man rather than God. I would be skeptical of how the church uses everyone's money. When I see others giving offerings and tithings to the church. It always seemed like they were giving those things away to the pastor rather than to the Lord. That would make me feel and think they are giving away their bills to a pastor for his own personal use rather than the church itself. I did not understand that. Honestly, I was still like that in this season of Covid-19. I have not given the church any money in this season. All I gave up was some air freshener and Pine-Sol for the church. I know that is a good start, but I feel that I should give money to the church in this season. I have to always be honest with myself and with God. I was never a blessing to our church and to other churches I've joined in my past when I was a little girl. I was taught to not give money to the church. Some people would deny being a blessing to their church. Some people would say that they are a blessing to their church and they are not. I am being honest with myself and with the Lord that I have not been a blessing to our church in paying my tithes in this season as well.
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