Gutting desires.
there's this gutting desire within me,
I want this, I want that.
I need this, I need that.
but I also feel like I can wait for the right person,
but as soon as I look to the other side something is gutting me from the inside out,
begging me to get someone,
to be loved,
like before.
to not be hated, or bullied,
by those you once loved, but aren't so sure about now.
you had the time of your life last night,
then the lamp turns back on,
to reveal the ugly, dying insides of what once was,
the loving, sweet girl?
turned cold.
the boy who once copied your every move?
he bullies and tortures you.
even the man you once we're so in love with,
you destroyed that too. maybe it really is me gutting myself from the inside out.
it seems like I destroy everything I ever love.
even myself.
sometimes it feels like I'm gutting myself from the inside out.
or maybe it's the people,
the people that I love and hold on to,
maybe they are the ones tearing me apart.
or maybe it's just me, gutting myself from the inside out.