I wish i could sat flames to his heart,
Mercilessly smashing it to smithereens.
It's not entirely my fault,
Neither his, but unknowingly,
He started the play that caused
Havoc to my heart following a huge crush.
He set my heart ablaze, and
It burned to wreckage.
A crush that never really went away,
Too contradictory for me to participate,
But cought me up in the act
While trying my hardest to ignore
But his path always end up intersecting mine.
Treading on ice too thin,
He decided to confront me
Making way for me to perish,
But also too scared to end in doom.
My pride presumed i could take flight,
And not answer his questions of curiosity.
I've never been more worried about falling,
But some words are better off unsaid,
So I stood there staring into his eyes,
And wondering if he felt the same way.
Maybe then, i would tell him the secrets,
That my mouth are too weak to utter.
I'm hoping he would tell me,
That he loves me too, and maybe
Our story will begin to be written,
Flawlessly just like in the movies,
And fighting against all odds,
To be in each other's company.
I know he is my Napoleon,
Or maybe it's just fantasies,
And a fairy tale of my heart,
But I really do need him,
To cure my heart aches.
Maybe he loves me too,
But he's just a soul too damaged,
To embrace my reflections in his,
Or maybe too blind to see my love,
But my heart says otherwise
And it aches for him instead.
I allowed him to go,
With great difficulty, I send my crush away.
Being double binded straining to conclude
Out the contradiction that he is.
But yet again,
I am the fool appearing in his shadows
In search of his glowing speck .
Surprisingly, I endure the pain so easily,
Or maybe i thought, but
Calling this addicting heart ache, affection,
And the horror of loneliness disire,
We lie to each other and to humanity,
That we don't feel a thing for each other.
The speeches inside me have
Become more of toture,
And mastering to accept that
We're not meant to be is,
An algebraic equation i need help with.
Making me call the odds to put ends to my fantasies.
And all this in vain.
©me.just.me
M