How do I tell my mother
that the girl she birthed and raised,
the girl she thought she knew
isn't that girl anymore?
How?
How do I tell her
that her daughter,
who wears a bright face by daylight,
cries herself to sleep every night?
How do I tell her
that her undeniably happy daughter
is suffocating
scared, oblivious?
Her baby
the one who fell asleep
the moment her head touched the pillow
now only pretends to sleep...
eyes wide, heart heavy.
The girl who never thought twice about anything
now carries a million thoughts in her head
thoughts too loud to clear.
How do I tell her
that I mask my face
to hide my pain from my own world?
I smile...
but it's just a facial expression.
The sadness leaks through my eyes
even when I laugh.
How do I tell her
that her daughter of young age
has grown overnight
not by years,
but by the weight of things
she never wanted to carry?
How do I tell her
that her beloved child
lost her pride,
her dignity,
her courage
and whatever is left of her
is fading too?
©meeyna.tou
M