Several months ago, my anger was so bad in quarantine and not just that. My anger would take me to a place where I did not want to be. My anger can lead to the wrath of extreme vengeance. What I mean by that is when someone tends to irritate me or try to find my weaknesses. I would get angry and forget about what the Lord says and I will take revenge on that person. By taking revenge I would feel like if someone wronged me, I should wrong them. What goes around, comes around. That is how my anger could lead to when I get upset. I would try hard to control my anger when someone would swear at me or disrespect me. That can be hard to do because I am the type of person who likes to stand up for myself. I do not want to be labeled as a weak individual. I want to be aggressive in standing up for myself. I have been having anger issues ever since I was in elementary school dealing with bullies and aggressive boys that would put their hands on me in a sexual way.
Growing up on the south side of the Roseland area known as the hood. I was always told in the black community that black women are supposed to be strong, independent, and aggressive. Women have to fight if someone crosses them. My mother, my aunts, and my cousins used to tell me that being a weak woman is not going to get me anywhere. I have to be a strong black woman to fight back. I had taken that advice. That is why all my life if someone disrespects me or shout at me, I would always go into defense mode. I would always let a person know not to cross me because if they do, I would tell them something bad will come their way. God knows I need deliverance from that evil spirit because that is not pleasing him at all. That is I like to refer to this scripture often that pertains to my behavior is in psalms 37:8 NIRV. "Turn away from anger and don’t give in to wrath. Don’t be upset, because that only leads to evil." Psalm 37:8.
Being in quarantine was a struggle not getting out of the house, but I thank God I can do more of that now. I hated when I was getting interrupted with things. What I learned was from this scripture
Proverbs 19:11. "A person’s wisdom makes them patient. They will be honored if they forgive someone who sins against them. " NIRV. Is that wisdom comes with patience. I have to accept the fact that when I am at home, I am going to get interrupted regardless even if I do not like it. I have to have patience if someone interrupts me and not get angry. I have to have patience with myself and with God.
The steps I took to improve my anger is through communications. I have to communicate with someone about how I feel about a situation. Communication is the key to all relationships. Also, staying in prayer every day, meditating, and studying the word keeps me growing in faith. Additionally, another way I am taking to improve my anger is through my poetry and artworks. When I write poems and create artworks such drawings, paintings, and collages are healing techniques for me to use. Those things are therapeutic to help me express my thoughts, emotions, and feelings. If you are struggling with something, find a way to release your pain instead of taking it out on someone. Therapeutic techniques help, and going to the lord with your problems is much better than anything else.
To be brutality honest with you readers, there will come a time when someone will press your buttons. It doesn't matter if you are religious or not. People would try to get under your skin, and to be real with you all, we all do have to always stand up for ourselves in whatever situation we are in with a negative person, but the only way to do it is through wisdom. Fighting is not the answer in solving a problem, but always express yourself.
#anger#management
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