I love him, but…
I love him
with the kind of ache that settles in my bones,
like a song that plays on repeat
but never brings peace.
I watch him smile,
and my heart forgets to guard itself,
again, and again,
foolish in its faith,
naïve in its hope.
He holds my hand,
but sometimes it feels like I’m holding on
to a shadow,
to someone who’s slipping away
even as he stands beside me.
I try to speak,
but my voice gets tangled in the silence,
in the things I can’t say
like how I cry in the dark
so he won’t see the weight I carry
just to stay.
I love him.
God, I do.
But love shouldn’t feel like this
like I’m drowning in something
that was supposed to save me.
I whisper prayers
into the cracks of my soul,
asking for a sign,
a reason to stay,
a reason to go.
Because every day,
my heart breaks a little more,
and still,
it beats his name.
©️Her Poetic Journey
H