I'm Trying

I'm Trying

I’m trying.

I don’t know if you noticed,

but I’m trying.

Trying to move on.

Trying to forget —

even though I don’t want to.

My heart doesn’t want to.

There are girls who like me.

I could make a move.

I’ve thought about it.

But every time I see you,

I get confused all over again.

I’m trying…

but I can’t let go.

When we started talking,

I was broken.

Alone.

Miserable.

Scared.

I didn’t even care if I disappeared.

Yeah… I guess I was really depressed.

I never told you about my scars.

Why it was so hard for me to open up.

Sometimes I wonder —

if I had told you,

would you have seen

that I needed you

just as much as you needed someone like me?

I’m trying, princess.

I really am.

You came into my life

and healed parts of me

I thought would stay damaged forever.

You made me want to live again —

not just exist.

I was breathing before,

but I wasn’t alive.

And now,

those scars reopen

again

and again.

I respected your decision.

I still do.

But I miss you.

Your laugh.

Your smile.

Even the way you were a little too much sometimes.

You were everything I wanted.

You made me feel something real.

We always said we liked each other.

But I love you.

I love you —

even if you don’t want to be with me.

I’m trying.

It’s hard.

But I’ll keep trying.