It is what it is.

I'm angry.
Angry at life.
You never know what the person sitting across from you is going through.
I'm in so much pain but I continue to be the person I was meant to be. I continue to smile, I continue to laugh, and I continue to cheer others up.
Just because I'm on the dark side doesn't mean I want to bring anyone down with me.
My depression continues to lure me to the side of a cliff, promising a beautiful view, only for it to get ready and push me off.
It's called the game of life.
Theres no extra lives in this game.
Theres no final prize for "winning".
And not everyone can make it to the next level, despite them being a "good" person who doesn't deserve having the shit they're going through.
You lose your home, due to your roommate losing a job.
It is what it is.
At the same time your vehicle breaks down and it will cost over $8000 to fix.
It is what it is.
I work 8 casual jobs, past full time hours and have perfect credit to be declined for a loan to get a new cheap vehicle.
It is what it is.
I work a lot of doubles because work is one place I can be and manage to function like a normal human being.
It is what it is.
I have a father whom I love so dearly but emotionally abusive.
It is what it is.
I found out I might be diagnosed with a neurological disorder and blood disorder that causes flare ups including losing mobility and speech and has long lasting effects.
It is what it is.
I have a mom who is a narcissist who only reaches out when she needs something from you. It's also been months since she's reached out despite knowing what's going on.
It is what it is.
I have a boyfriend that I'm madly in love with, who is getting deployed to the other end of this planet this summer, and there's nothing we can do about it, but break up.
It is what it is.
I'm gaining weight, and losing muscle because I have no energy to keep going to the gym.
It is what it is.
I spend every night in bed crying, for this pain to stop.
It is what it is.
My battle is only my battle to fight, so why do I feel so defeated. Is it worth fighting anymore?
©ourreality