Jaded

J-ust one more time,maybe it'll be the final straw,maybe I need this one to make me see. That this..this is not what I want for me.
A-gain the cycle repeats it self.This time it's loud and visually clear.I could feel it in my bones; I should leave this one alone, but still, I chase it like a dog after a bone.
D-ispite my efforts. I am once again defeated.Trying to contain my disappointment without entering into a bitter place. Some say seeing is believing.Funny it's the only way I'd believe it.
E-motionally drained, I wreck my brain. As to why no matter the pain, I know that I would do it all over again.
D-efeated ,confused and lonely. Bitterness opened its arms to welcome me. I managed to redirect my path and walk away. In light of reconditioning my soul; some day.
F. Smith