Dear, God
I’m sorry that it’s been a while
I tried to walk a mile
On my own and not be a child
Stumbled too far again
All I got now is some paper and a pen
I’m a little far off now
Haven’t forgotten to pray, just don’t know how
To tell You I failed to make You proud
And it’s hard to see the sky through these dark clouds
Dear, God
I’m writing to say I miss You
I hope You know I didn’t take this route just to dis You
I swear that’s the truth
Just needed to get away
I didn’t want to do everything Your way
Dear, God
I’m still angry
I’m angry with You, I’m angry with me
Hating myself for falling into a trap
And I still can’t wrap
My head around it
I call bullshit
On this crap
I mean, Why’d You send her; Why’d You let me care
If she was never even going to be there?
Dear, God
Was that fake love?
Some kind of twisted sign from above?
Call me old fashioned, but You made me like this
Here I was holding out hope for bliss
Like You promised
And if it was just a dream, than that’s the memo I missed
But it doesn’t matter now, does it; add those to the pile
Of unanswered prayers that you have on my file
All it’s ever left me is a broken smile
Dear, God
Forgive me for being tired of waiting
For complaining
For blaming
You for all that wasted time
Heck, here I am apologizing in rhymes
Dear, God
I’m just tired of making deals with You
Or were those delusions of a sky better than the blue
That hid behind my pain-clouded view
I swear I’m not ungrateful
And I’m trying my best not to be hateful
But it’s just hella hard being faithful
When the world feels cold and black
But I swear to You that I know my way back
Dear, God
Sometimes it gets harder to breathe
Why’d You give me asthma, why not the ability
To be patient
I mean, even this anxiety is blatant
And here I am feeling spent
Needing something Heaven-sent
I need some kind of miracle
To let me know that You hear my call
Dear, God
©_malwar3
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