A month later, Mrs. Atkins does two interviews with Mala. But Mala still will need more time to get close to Chris again. She informed Mala to not let that night in the cabin take hold of her thinking that she can not get close to any males anymore because every male is different.
"Mala, just because you meet someone else that does not mean he will abuse you or rape you, all men are not a rapist," Mrs. Atkins informs.
"I think so," she said.
"Do you want to get close to Chris again?" Mrs. Atkins asked.
"Yes but... I don't know when because I still haven't..." Getting cut off.
"Gotten over that night?" Mrs Atkins knew what she was going to say. "Mala, you can not let the pass haunt you, that will not help you move forward, you must learn how to move forward with things, and if you don't, people will start pulling away from you because you are still stuck in the past, and you keep bringing up the past," Mrs. Atkins informs.
"God I didn't know the past can be that harmful," she said.
"It can. When you hold on to something traumatic from and the bad experiences occured, can affect today. The experiences you had and talking about it today and the other sessions we had were likely shaped by the past events you have been through. Events in your childhood or early adulthood can shape the way you think, act, and interact with people close to you. The memory is a tricky thing. Our past, present, and future are closely linked by our memories. The brain is not a true recording device that can recall any moment in time and accurately depict what happened. Our minds play tricks on us, memories are heavily influenced based on our feelings we had surrounding the event or experiences," Mrs. Atkins informs.
"So if I stop talking about it?" She asked.
"I didn't say stop talking about it. Stop reliving the bad moments of the past thinking that all guys are rapist, because of the men in India you mentioned that most of them are rapist?" Mrs. Atkins asked.
"Yeah they are," she said.
"There are a lot of good wise boys and men out there and every where you go, so don't blame it on the men in India. Do you think your father a rapist?" Mrs. Atkins asked.
"What?" Mala asked.
"Do you think your father is a rapist?" Mrs Atkins repeated.
"Nooo, my father would never do such a thing like that, he is a good man and a great father to me and my siblings, and a great husband to my mother, no he is never a bad
man," Mala said.
"Exactly, that explains it there. If all men are rapist, than that would include your father in, but he isn't, he is a good respectful man, so you know all men are not rapist nor criminals," Mrs. Atkins said.
"I never really thought of it in that way," she said.
"That's why you are here for me to help you understand your past and present," Mrs. Atkins said.
"So how do I get over the past because it still haunts me and I still don't know if I'm able to be close to Chris, and my parents definitely don't want me near him again after what he tried to do," she said.
"Your past brought you to where you are today. We all have heard statements like "everything happens for a reason,” or “you learn lessons from every experience,” but what if you don’t like what happened to you? How can you change your outlook for the future? Here are a few suggestions I have that will help you move forward while you're still a child because your traumatic memory can ruin your childhood years as a teenager. So here is some suggestions for you Mala. Practice self-talk, creating a peaceful environment, being mindful about how you live, not living in the past, but looking towards the future. How do you get over those traumatic events?Well, Practicing self-talk reinforces the positive side of things like a glass half full, rather than half empty. Life is ten percent what happens to us, but the 90 percent is how we choose to handle it. So start today by choosing to see the good rather than the bad. You can overwrite your past with new experiences and form better memories to recall in the future. Even the most positive of people have self doubt at times, and that is normal. I’m just suggesting for you to find a way to release the pain and come back to a place of positive and these exercises will help you in knowing how to handle the bad things that will occur in your future and that it will keep you not from holding on to bad events that will put yourself in a state of shame, self doubt, and also blaming others for the bad situation you was in, and that happens so often with people," Mrs. Atkins informs.
"Wow, I'm learning so much," she said.
"These tools will be helpful to use, and I will give you a pamphlet on how to use these exercises. Our time is up now," Mrs. Atkins said.
"Thank you," she said.
Author Ciara Webb
Co-Assistants 26Khayali and Ridhi P
Story written by Ciara Webb
Co-author Mansi Rupesh More
© All Rights Reserved
©mairawrite
M