MOTHER
I once lived in a room
where I waited for gentle words
the way thirsty soil waits for rain—
but nothing ever fell.
I tried to earn kindness
the way a small lamp tries.
but Every glimps of mistake
was met with storms I didn’t understand.
You wished me a brutal death
where my throat would be rotten with bugs
you wished for a death where I wouldn’t be able to get help
But I was silenced.
hoping effort would turn into affection. You won't angry with me this much.
believing good children absorb everything
without bleeding.
You cursed me about my future where i can't reach the moon.
You cursed me
with a future where the man I marry
would smell another woman’s scent.
But silence has a price.
It carved me into someone
who mistrusts every voice,
every hand,
every small rise of anger—
as if behind every person
your shadow is hiding,
waiting to repeat your words.
I was taught that feeling is dangerous,
and people are storms disguised as homes.
now im in a loop.
This is what you built, Mother—
a heart which is confused
and trained to hate
and a child who grew up thinking
love was just another way
to be destroyed.
I hate mankind mother
Cause everybody feels like you.
S