I am more or less a shell of the man I used to be, a vessel for this tormented soul, that is somehow known as me.
I once was full of hope, joy and so much life, now I find myself occasionally and I'm living with such strife.
The only things that comfort me are two children, a boy and girl, those two are the reason for my existence in this cruel, unruly world.
Their laughter pains my soul though, their joy slowly rips my heart in two, both of them remind me of days before with you.
But lo, I do not hate them for bringing back such painful memories, they are only children who are a special part of me.
Their blue eyes are not unlike portals, leading me to a forgotten realm, where knights and dragons do exist and we all wear chain mail and helms.
We wander through vast lands in their worlds of fantasy, they both still call me father in this land of make believe.
And we save a princess, my daughter, sister to my son; we fight along great heroes until the battle's finally won.
Then we climb that mountain of pillows but in his mind it's rock and stone, to a castle where my daughter rests, quiet and alone.
A dragon slumbers deeply, awaiting for heroes such as we, to rescue my daughter, his sister, to set the princess free.
And once we've slain that dragon, he takes up her fragile hand, he leads her down the mountains and back through that wasteland.
Then we have a feast and celebrate the heroes brave as he, we sing songs of glory and triumph, the day we set the princess free.
But once again our time is over and their mothers come back to claim them once more, we've slain dragons and fought battles, but daddy still loses the war.
Despite my best attempts and everything I've tried, I lose my children everytime in the end and once more a part of me has died.
So I sit there in the living room, a beer and guitar within my hands, I think back to the times I've shared with them in those dark and cryptic lands.
And that's what keeps me going, until another weekend I gain them back, they're the only joy within my life it seems, they're the only thing I lack...
©jarnmarr
J