I have laid in this bed, still for months and yet, I don't understand the whole point .
my arms stopped moving and then my feet and then my head. I have noticed my body is desiccating and I can't help but wonder why It just can't give up.
A piece of my flesh from my knees broke off today and with it, memories that had long been forgotten. I remembered the pain of the stone I fell upon when I was 5, it hurt so badly.
I remembered the heat of the iron that was placed at the table but I was too anxious to have my porridge so I bumped my knee into it.
I remember the irritation of the sand I crawled into the very first day my mother let me out of the house.. I remembered!
As I was still reminiscing about the fond memories, a piece of flesh from my arm broke off, I remembered...
I remembered the grip of the hugs I had received from the people around me, I remembered the joy ,the pain and the smells.. I remembered the intentions of the people I allowed into my arms, most being beautiful and full of love and since time told , some wicked! I can not dwell of the pain they caused because then I would lose focus on the reason for being a spectator to my own desiccating body....
I remembered my folded little hands, and the grip on my mother's shirt or my father's.
Then like in a bad dream, my ears fell off. I remembered the lessons from my favourite people, the talk about life and how I needed to be strong if I wanted to make it..
I remembered the very sound of music I ever listened to and I remembered the cries, the cries of the little ones that were with me on the very first day ..
My eyes dried up and like dust, they blew away from my face. I could not see a thing but I remembered!
I remembered the face of the one that led me to this mortifying state. The smile on their lips as they promised a love that I really could never have in a thousand life times .. and I remembered how quickly they fled at hearing about my sicknesses, my troubles, my pain.
Then I remembered the face.. The kind face that I first ever saw, my mother's face and how we locked eyes and I felt her love. . A pleasant feeling.
Then my skin crumbled and fell off of my bones..
I remembered the pressure I felt as I pushed myself to Life then the warmth of the water in which I became...
My heart teared up into a million pieces and..........
©karen1996
K