Time is wasting
Time for pacing
I can feel the anticipation
I can feel my heart racing
Is there time for the planning?
I cant help my type of thinking
It feels pointless to keep on trying
Its killing me to keep on striving
My walls become thicker stronger for me
Stuffing hiding how I'm truly feeling
I can never see myself rising
I only see myself drowning
So I fantasize myself of my own demise
And throw on a mask of my disguise
A forceful smile to walk through the crowd
The jokes and laughs are for those around
I cant shed them tears cause I'd feel weak
I know I'm losing myself so let me be!
Telling me itll get better I'll never believe
It always gets worse and everyone leaves
Stop talking cause I'm done listening
Cant you see that I'm just done trying?
Every night I lie wide awake thinking
I wish I can be better so it could be different
©deathbear
D