for all the things that have scarred me...
For all the pain; I'm SO sorry...
All these wounds are self-inflicted...
Most of my life I've been addicted...
With myself, I have to be truthful, I no longer am youthful...
Swimming in a sea of addictions...
Beat down by random afflictions...
I cry out🗣 to an open sky🌌....
GOD? PLEASE!!! I DONT WANNA DIE...
Of an overdose, or even worse...
I've been fighting for my life since birth🥊
Registering everyone's reactions...
Leaving my family in ashes...
I need healing: No. Wait, I need SAVING..
Its GODS power I'm craving...
Though I've always been humble...
I need to SPEAK UP....and not mumble...
Sometimes for my soul I worry, because I grew up in such a hurry...
My soul was burned but not blackened...
And the devils grip...it has slackened...
I break free from that vice grip..
🙏THEN THE NEGATIVITY EMPTIES
FROM ME LIKE A GUN CLIP🙏
For a moment, there's clarity...
And the answer, it's there for me...
But I haven't asked the right question...
Every bad experience should be a lesson...
I should always be learning...
Now my ❤heart❤ it has this yearning...
To bathe in Christs love, instead of washed in MY blood...
To find some release and finally feel peace...
So I wont be alone, to start my long journey home...
Where I dont have to hide; and when I've healed inside...
I will walk in his brilliance.
My heart WILL know resilience.
And I WILL MEET RESISTANCE.
Well aware of the devil's existence!
Hes always there, lurking, with arrogance hes smirking...
USE ONCE AND THEN DESTROY??!!?
ANOTHER OF HIS MANY PLOYS!!!
my heart cries like steel guitars..
THESE are the lines to my battle scars...
When we threw down I won, now I'm caught in the light of His son...
Born again in the smile of His grace...
So much lighter when I leave this place..
As He carries me out these doors...
I'll have won my internal wars...
Becoming who I've wanted to be...
The person my mom wants to see...
The mother my sons neeed from me
Stronger and stronger I'm becoming...
From Him I no longer am running...
My steps becoming lighter and lighter..
🥊YOU CAN'T SAY IM NOT A FIGHTER🥊...
But now, I'll fight in Gods Army...
The devil no longer can harm me...
And the perfect person to love me..
He is always above me, ALWAYS
!
©maegan
M