Hiding inside my mind is nothing new to me,
Its my safe place where I feel nothing but ease,
Memories of our beginning flew like dust waves,
I loathe myself of what has been replaced,
I told you before when another part of me had died,
Unaware of a new mask my head decide to provide,
My masks are masks but this one is very special,
Why does it matter to have one for this vessel?
Wildfires growing around those I've loved,
Facing the day with my chin still held up,
I guess you can say I'm stuck in denial,
My mournful face I cover with a smile,
My repeative thoughts are breaking my heart,
I don't know where it ends or even starts,
I try to keep myself pulled together,
Is it them or me who really suffers?,
Branded in my head mistakes were made,
I'm selfish enough to go as I would if I stayed,
Million times again my lesson wasn't learned,
Your ears drifts off to where my voice isn't heard,
Its like I can't be seen from your blinded eyes,
Can you not recognize me in this disguise?
I made it myself like I did for the others,
Just like a shield or armor it is my protector,
Please pardon my actions for being so cold,
Keep holding onto what is needed for my soul,
Its a familiar feel of grasp i have with reality,
Over time I became what you needed me to be,
Suffocating it is under these masks Ive created,
I cant be me cause its not me that is needed,
If I could have one thing back from the past,
It'd be to have my loved ones here and us come back
©deathbear
D