another sleepless night.
stress level erupts.
blood pressure chooses to spike.
falling down a hole so low.
lower than six feet.
growing closer to death.
visions of my friends haunt me as itch away at death's cold right hand.
my girlfriend's kiss her touch oh how I finally understood fear as I laid there knowing I never felt her touch if I don't get up.
if I don't die willingly.
yet what is it to die? does it hurt? I pondered these questions knowing they might be my last.
scared frightened cuz I almost overdosed on pills I didn't think before taking them.
yet I thought about her and my friends I didn't want to leave them.
yet this was a near death experience that cut me deep.
as I wanted to live unless adolescent me I probably would have welcomed death.
yet a dash of salt was unlikely remedy yet I shoved a few spoonfuls in my mouth swallowing it hard like whiskey in a shot glass. coughing alil shaking my head the taste was far from sweet.
yet my mind kept wondering what would I tell her tomorrow morning like good morning babe I almost died last night or good morning babe you almost lost me to a wretched overdose on accident? I cringe at both of theses yet I didn't want to leave her I knew how much I mean to her? yet somehow in some weird way I was ready.
yet I chose to stay.
I chose to live a little while longer.
at a blood pressure level 125 I chose to survive.
like a slasher movie somehow changed I made it out still alive
©darkdeity
D