Baby, I won't be at your funeral tonight
I know I should show up cuz it's polite
And I know you would be saying that I have just as much right
But honestly, I just can't go, I don't have anymore fight
I was thinking tho how grateful I am for all the times we held eachother so damn tight
You knew it would be soon when you saw the light
So we made the most of the days we had
I'm glad you don't hurt anymore but why did you leave us all so sad
I have to say, I did love you with all I had
I know I used to get so mad
Mad at myself cuz I couldnt cheer u up
I always felt I failed when you just answered with a short "yup"
now I see there wasn't much I could do
Your happiness and thoughts had to come from only you
You needed to be closer with God too
I couldnt save you or make you not so blue
You were sadder then any of us knew
You didn't even give us a clue
Leaving behind guilt to only a select few
I had no idea that Saturday would be your cue
To make our bedroom your final view
I have to let go now my baby
As much as I want to hold on to you forever
It will drive me absolutely crazy
I have to put you out of my mind
Or else that day will get stuck on rewind
And then i will never quit looking and trying to find
Answers to why you left
Truth is that you robbed us from loving you
You took you from us baby, thruth is, it was theft
Wondering "what if" won't ever be resolved
So, I have to forget you before I ever would of wanted
I have to block out the images in my brain of you that are now haunted
I will never have the you that I once flaunted
cuz you decided to leave
I can't even take anymore time to sit and grieve
Some would say I'm selfish and they won't even try to conceive
And I know It will be hard for others to believe
But if I don't put you out of my mind
Then freedom for me I will never find
I cant go on, I can't live
You have to know I gave all I could ever give
So, I have to let go of you and set myself free
So, I cant say goodbye to you again
I need to start over now, I need to begin
I have to go and start over now
Just like you showed me how
I had to let you go when you took your final bow
I know if you hear me you are thinking wow!!
But I hope you understand, I need to forget who was once known as "us"
U ended that on your own, you didn't make a fuss
To you, there was no us to discuss
So, Not to be mean or to get back at you
But, so, that I can continue to live apart and broken too
It's the only way I can survive, it's the only thing i can do
I need to forget, ignore, forbid
what you really did
In order for me to try to start again, to really try and begin
What you gave me to continue replaying and to always relive
I have to let go, so I have to forget and really try and forgive
Time for me to start over again
So, farewell my most treasured thought
From now on you will only be remembered as a love I almost caught
A love I went after and saught
A love I actually faught
A love that could never be bought
A love that will now stay deep inside me and rott
A love lesson that my heart was certainly taught
That sometimes real love is hidden so deep inside that it protrays the tiniest dot
But really it was the biggest kind of love
It just never got its chance
It never got it's big shot
I pray somewhere past this life that we finally will have everything we almost had and all that we almost got
And we hold in our hearts what slipped right thru
I pray it feels just as beautiful as inside, we always knew
And maybe those two broken souls they called me and you
Will become a love nobody ever experienced or ever even knew
Maybe we started to create a love we alone couldnt of grew
So, Maybe God wanted your hard work and perfect talent to make it whole
And maybe the main ingredient that we needed for our love to be completed
Was quite simply you and your sweet soul!
©vickia1953
V