Panic Room
I feel it growing, the hate inside
The older I get, the more I divide
From the world, from people, from the noise
I'd rather be alone, in my own dark joys
Every day, it's the same
Hating people, feeling drained
Wanting to be quiet, to escape the pain
But deep down, I know it's not what I want to claim
I want to connect, to talk, to share
But my social body's dead, and I'm left with despair
It's like I'm trapped, in a panic room
Where humanity sucks, and I'm the one who's doomed
Is it trauma? Is it the past?
Is it the weight of the world that's crushing me at last?
Every time I think about it, I retreat
Into my shell, where it's safe, where I can breathe
I'm torn, I'm lost, I'm searching for a way
To reconcile my heart, to find a brighter day
I want to be with people, to feel alive
But the fear, the anxiety, it keeps me captive
I'd rather be lonely, than put myself out there
Than risk getting hurt, than face the snare
But the loneliness, it eats away
At the hope I have, at the love I can't display
Humanity sucks, it's true
But maybe, just maybe, it's not entirely new
Maybe it's me, maybe it's my view
Maybe I just need to find a way to break through.
T