PRETTY NO MORE
I find myself questioning just how deep my soul is my outward appearance makes me think to myself that I and pretty no more I Have Become my worst critic I cannot look in the mirror and sincerely say that I am I beautiful person with a beautiful soul a beautiful spirit a kind heart warm heart loving heart Compassionate Heart and pathetic heart sympathetic heart all of my inner thoughts & things that I think about saying are pretty no more I am fighting daily and Uphill battle against principalities orchestrated to bring me down to the lowest of levels a human can be and that makes me pretty no more I've never really pretended to be someone or anyting that I am not it's virtually impossible for me to Fathom being anyone else but me becoming a better me but never wanting to be someone else because I don't know their Journey I don't know the road they traveled to Damascus and if you live long enough you will eventually have to walk your own road to Damascus and right now I've been on my road to Damascus for a while now I keep trying to understand why things have come to be the way that they are and I realize that that is one of my mistakes trying to understand wow painfully trying to adjust to the changes life is about changes without change there is no growth without growth there is death I am not delusional I know that life it's not all fun and games there's always a deeper purpose for each and every life form from Human animal plants seeds clouds oceans Stars the Moon I could go on and on but you get where I'm going and now that I am pretty no more and I have decided to dig deeper and deeper Within my own thoughts Behavior the structure of my being Dennis essity of my existence is mostly a mystery I can talk about what I believe are certain gifts that God placed Within Me while I was still warm in my mother's womb growing and being formed getting ready to come out and be a part healthiest big beautiful world now that I am pretty no more I can see much clearer that there has never been I'm more important time such as this to recognize that we are at a Crossroads and I am a part of the masses honestly I do not follow the politics as much I now follow the signs that are as Vivid as the sun it's bright and now that I am pretty no more I only want to share the best that I have to offer of myself and many times I fall short and I only have myself to blame for that and even though I am still playing by major depression chronic insomnia that you would not believe anxiety is still part of the package but I'm starting to realize that it is a waste of time trying to be more then I am capable of being perhaps someday once I have completed my travel on my road to Damascus then I will have no need to look back and feel ashamed have any regrets I even wonder why things happen the way they did so I asked for now as tired and winded as I am I asked God to provide me with his strength his wisdom his grace is Mercy his love to help me make it to the end of my road of my travel to Damascus so now that I and pretty no more I can release and let go and let God have control my outward appearance may show the depression the lack of sleep and some anxiety if anyone should look at me in person and even pictures behind the smile I know did I am pretty no more
P