God I need you,
Now and more then ever.
My spirit feels fruitless.
I feel I don't know what to do,
accept serve you.
And even still as I strive to,
It's seems I come short.
That I am ever short of your glory.
That I can't grab hold of hope.
I do believe in sacrifice.
It's seems things will only be right after i die.
I don't know why,
Still can't figure out how,
I still have tears to cry.
Feels like my heart is dry.
My honour and integrity lost.
Lord please forgive me,
I don't mean to tempt you with my words.
My only wish is that you hear me God.
I know I am observed.
Better i am content with that.
I wounded myself,
With a never ending pain.
My mind is a battle,
And at times I went insane,
But you brought me back.
I'm sorry that I lack natural affection.
I'm sorry honestly and courage,
From myself I neglected.
Forgive me. Instead of you,
It was persons I respected.
Makes since why I am so hectic.
Please I pray heavenly father for your mercy.
Please give me the strength I need to bear these curses.
Please help me not be weak my king, and my saviour.
Please show me what it means to be a man.
Until the end.
I won't give up God, Its not in my heart to do.
Eventhough I have been disobedient,
played a thief and fool.
I know those roles were not meant for me.
I'm not a soul seeking for sympathy.
I just want clearity father.
Please I pray you rend these demons from my soul.
They strive to hold me down.
Working 24/7.
Making sure my hearts not sound.
It's sucks to say but I know now.
Hope it's not to late.
But I know now...
J