To my little girl self..
I know life was hard for you,
I know daddy hurt you to,
I know you were hungry most of the times.
I know you carried a lot in your mind.
I know you didn't wear the proper clothing to school.
I know you were a good girl who never broke any rules.
But I know you are strong, you will face what's ahead of you.
I know you will make it, because you have to.
To my Teenager self..
I know you feel closed up inside from the abuse of our father.
But the one who finally stood up to him was our mother.
She loves you so much,
And finally said " enough is enough. "
Now you don't have to be scared anymore.
You can smile, laugh, and run out the door
You can finally act like a teenager and hang out with your friends.
All that past chaos has finally come to an end.
To my 18 year old self..
I know what had happened to you is affecting you today.
Because you are falling in love and you are not okay.
What our dad did to you was a shameful thing, no daughter should experience this.
But your first boyfriend will understand and he will try to cover your scars with a kiss.
Someday my teenager self will fall head over heels in love.
Some day, you will understand all this grown up stuff.
To my 35 year old self...
I know you thought you met the one over and over again.
But some of your relationships ended bad while others you remained as friends.
Your latest one gave you 2 beautiful girls that will end up being your world.
It's okay that you left him because you did not deserve to be verbally abused.
So you took your girls and left which made everyone confused.
But at least you can finally breathe again.
At least you brought the abuse to an end.
To my 50 something self..
Here I am writing this from my heart.
I am stronger then I ever was before, I fought struggles but I didn't fall apart.
My daughters are my world and I am not alone.
I will always have love in my life as long as I have them, we together have grown.
I may have suffered as a child, I may have been a lost teen, I may have suffered sexual and verbal abuse but I am standing here on my own.
I have grown!!!.
©terrylin53
T