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The nightmare when he left me

The Nightmare When He Left Me
I lay every night alone in my bed always wishing you'd come back to me missing you like crazy it wasn't supposed to end this way.

You lied to me when you said you loved me and I heard the same song of lies over and over again. I'm tired of hurting over you.

Every night when I sleep it's this nightmare I have of you leaving me over and over again
I try dreaming of the good we had but it always seems to replay the day you left me.
I'm tired and in pain please make this all go away
Once I wake up to this nightmare I turn around to wish the nightmare wasn't true
I look beside me and notice your spot is still empty and cold.

I always wished to be free from you but now I hate sleeping alone as much as you hurt me I don't want to let you go.
We loved each other for 15 years I wasted my life away with you I wanted a family but all you wanted was another woman.

I guess I wasn't good enough or maybe you just got bored of me if you ever loved me then we'd still be together
I'm fed up of this wasted life I just wanna hide in plain sight away from everyone who hurt me in my past life
I don't trust easy no more not since that night.

The blood was pouring and it was snowing my veins cut open
I'm almost dying but then I woke up crying knowing I'm still alive and I'm laying in a white room hooked to machines.

I was alone with no one to visit me I'm on suicide watch.
I'm loving the medicines here I feel numb I love the feeling of the medicines being pumped
I love the rush it's giving me my emotions are numb.

I'm getting better everyday now I have the help I need
'Cause of him anytime someone mentions his name I always flip out and then feel numb
I pop my pills in my mouth, down it goes at least I can sleep
I finally found a way to rid of the nightmares I once had
I love how I can sleep hours and wake up with a smile on my face
Today is a good day and I'll keep it that way no more fears no more nightmares
I'm cured from that as long as I take these pills.

Maybe next time I fall in love
I'll feel happier then I ever have
But for now I gotta keep finding myself and love myself before I can love someone else.
Maybe next time I'll watch out who I fall for and watch out for their lies and cheating ways
But for now I'll walk on water and be happy I'm still alive.
©nini100