My tears trigger feelings of depression that have embedded themselves in my DNA. When the pain is excruciating grumpiness becomes my neighbor. His friends anxiety and insecurity invite themselves over to the circus; that is my life. Together they all form a blanket of negativity that block out any kind of joy my heart yearns to experience. I rest in my thoughts of self-sufficiency but even that is a temporary fix to my aging permanent problems. Desire soons fades into past tense, the present tense only consisting of what there that's leftover to live in the moment. I write letters with no address in hope of finding a worthy savior. Only to be greeted with disappointment that further stifles my pursuit of happiness. In due time an unhealthy cycle is formed that I once thought was possible to excape, soon realizing that all excape routes were merely a trap leading to yet another unhealthy emotional state of mind...
©t_bray
T