As I sit here in total denial I don't understand how nor why? I lost you on a very faithful day as a storm hit and passed us as you did the same! I still remember on the day of your passing I had to plead with you and God himself to take you home because of the pain you we're in. as I sat by your bedside and at that point and time I saw a tear in your eye telling me that it was time I watched you take one last breath as a rush of warmth hit my body it was you telling me I am okay and that I am going home! I felt lost but saw you at peace! I cried knowing that your time was over here on earth and I knew at this point I wouldn't receive a call or a video chat from you anymore I was disconnected from the world as everything went silent I felt uneasy do to the new event's that started. I was in a loss in my state of mind.... As the anniversary comes on June 18th at 5:18 pm it will hit me hard because it has been a full year you have been gone from this world and I know my voice can no longer reach nor can I touch your hand I am saddened with grief and pain my heart is very heavy because life was so short. I see darkness and pain every single day and don't know how to deal or move forward because it was so soon! life is a valuable thing watching everything flyby is the hardest. I still remember when I was a boy drawing you pictures at school and playing hockey outside in the driveway when you were mowing the grass. I'm sorry we just got your remains a week ago but with the illness going around because of another country we we're delayed I didn't make it back to my Jeep that day before I lost it seeing all of this was too much and my heart broke! I ask myself why I have so much weight and heartache on my chest only to have your face pop into my mind! Janet Susie Miller Dec 20th 1954 to June 18th 2020 rest in peace Mom you are missed more than you know.....
©seanmiller
S